Beginnings, Endings, and Project 365

So much has happened since I stopped writing in 2021. I stopped planning and started DOING in earnest. I landed a BIG job as an Executive Director of a local nonprofit. I am allowing myself to see me as an important and influential person, someone with worth and value to offer my community. It started with some terrified feelings and literal sweating my first few weeks. But now I am nearly 2 years in and loving it. I have grown into the position and didn't quit. I have days where I still question my abilities and the Board for hiring me... but, the impostor syndrome is mostly gone. I have had to face uncomfortable truths about myself as a professional, but I did it without a prolonged collapse or otherwise embarrassing childish reaction. I have grown.

With 20 years of marriage down, we filed for divorce. After years of twisting myself in knots trying to be happy with only being who I thought he wanted, I realized it wasn't what I wanted... and that mattered. I realized that he wasn't what I wanted... and that mattered. I wasn't wrong for not being able to like or want him; or to be someone he liked and wanted. Things have been amicable. The kids are fine. We lived apart for so long it feels like a natural conclusion to a decade of not quite happy. We talk of kids and finances and we are perfectly content to leave it at that. The anger and sadness are there. They will be dealt with in therapy when I'm ready. Hopefully soon.

I summitted Mount Kilimanjaro!! At around 9:30am local Tanzania time on September 28th, 2023 I stood atop the world's tallest freestanding mountain. Yup. It took about a year of planning and training and piecemeal purchasing of tickets and gear. Preparing for the trip itself was its own mountain-climbing experience for me, considering the self-doubt I had to deal with. I did it. I went. I climbed. I conquered. I took a ton of photos and videos! It was the most difficult thing I have ever done, and I am including the two times I gave birth without drugs.

I decided to do another photo-a-day challenge, but kick it up a tiny notch with a promise to myself to also accompany every photo with a written description. Posted here. This way I combine my writing and photography together and hopefully create something I will look back on and thoroughly enjoy. I can even turn it into a book later if I wish. I also wanted to give myself some space to be more expressive if the mood strikes me. Blogs are perfect for that.

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Hurricane Sandy

This will be a gleefully uneventful post, but I thought I should at least inform everyone of our whereabouts during Frankenstorm. On Friday the landfall predictions were further south, which had the eye passing near our tiny town after obliterating Dover, DE. We happen to be surrounded by water. The Patuxent River on one side, Chesapeake Bay on the other, plenty of swamps and creeks in between. Not a good prospect. Josh and I had gone out that night to try and secure supplies and already, there were no batteries or flashlights. We also don't have a grill and thought "we'll try Lowe's tomorrow"I mean, most people already own grills... right? Everything in our house is run on electricity (including the water pump for the well) except for the fireplace. I don't know what builders are thinking when they do that. I at least want a gas stove and water heater! So, anyways. We got a few hours of sleep before trying to brave the crowds...

Germany

Noah and I are having a great time out in Germany with Josh. The house we're sharing is amazing and the people are also amazing. The only thing we don't have is our own kitchen, but like I said, the people who live here (Josh's friends) are amazing so it's not even an issue. I've been cooking for everyone to try to thank them in some way. We haven't been to many places yet. It's hard to go anywhere with a baby who has a naptime and a husband who has a job. However!! We managed to make it out to Heidelberg to see the castle. It was awesome. the walk up to the castle mmmm castle Heidelberg down below Christmas is huge here. They've even got Christmas markets out in the parking lot in front of WalMart. We've been to Luisenplatz a few times in downtown Darmstadt to visit all the Christmas shops they have set up. It's like a Christmas flea market. Thus far all I've blown money on is candy... mmmm German candy is so delicious. It's...

Hiking on the Guadarrama Trail

As promised yesterday, I actually left the house and went on a hike with Mama C and Goober! YAY! I was a bad Mommy and ill prepared to shield us from the hot Spanish sun so we all have a touch of sunburn. Whoops. It was fun though. OK so here's where we began our journey. You can see the bridge between the roundabout and the little house with a red roof (which is a restaurant). All the cylindrical buildings were a plant nursery. We walked over the bridge and past the nursery where we crossed the street and then started up the dirt path. The other little building is literally a Gypsy Keep. Here's what it looked like from the road... and it was so ridiculously creepy, yet fascinating. I don't know why there is always tons of junk in trees around gypsy places. There was a gutted van in the backyard, a stroller jammed into a wall, shorts in the trees. We both wanted to trespass, but the kids would have inevitably fal...

This is My Forties

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