5yr Olds Are Horrible Liars

Noah and Tristan came walking into the kitchen while Josh and I were cooking dinner last night. Sheryl Crow's "Strong Enough" was playing and we were dancing and singing. I had just finished singing my line "lie to me. I promise I'll believe" so I guess I asked for it. I grabbed Noah for a little dancing, trying to get his hands out of his hoodie pocket which was covered with a white, hairy substance. He had previously waltzed into the kitchen with the same affliction and I asked if it was dog hair or horse hair (from the big stuffed horse "Nougat" we got from Gma N. 5 years ago). He claimed it was Bosley's hair. His hands were sweaty and he was quite keen on keeping them shoved in his pocket. I discovered that his little mitts were wrapped around his 2 new transformers and a pair of scissors. The scissors were also covered in white hair. He looked shocked. He'd been found out!

Noah... did you cut the horses hair?
No, Mommy.
Noah... don't lie to me. Did you cut the horses hair?
No.
Noah if I go up there and see his hair's cut you're going to be in big trouble for lying to me.
Ummm....



While I trekked upstairs to gaze upon Nougat's new 'do he confessed to Daddy. Noah spent the rest of the night in his bed (only about 20mins before dinner and bathtime). Not for giving Nougat a haircut, but for lying to me... again. He's been lying to me a lot lately and I can't seem to convince him that he will be in worse trouble for lying than for whatever he did wrong. He had to spend story time cleaning up hair and little snippets of paper. Earlier that day he thought it would be a great idea to draw a house on the wall with marker.

WHO DREW A HOUSE ON THE WALL?!
Ummmm... Tristan did it.
Are you lying to me?
No.
Bull crap, Noah! Tristan doesn't even know how to draw yet!!
Ummm.... ok ok ok I will tell you Mommy. I did it.
I know! Why did you lie about it?
Ummmm...
Go sit in your room.

And now, a few hours ago he gave Brennan a piece of granola bar while I was busy cleaning. There were granola chunks all over, but luckily Brennan spit them all out and never choked or anything.

Who gave Brennan a granola bar?
Ummm... Tristan did it, Mommy.
Really. Are you lying again?
No.
OK. Well you can't give babies real food. They can get really sick or hurt. They don't have teeth!
Ok, Mommy.

The more I thought about it, the more I realized he was lying to me. Tristan was whining for a granola bar, which means he saw someone else with one and desperately wanted it. He wouldn't give a granola bar to the baby, he'd keep it for himself. I asked Noah again... he finally came clean. He's been in his room ever since. I'm lucky Brennan was fine. Most of the other lies were comical, but I really don't want a little liar! Three strikes. It's time for ultimate time-out. HOURS of sitting alone. Like jail. :P
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