And So It Goes

In case the new header didn't tip you off... Josh is deploying again. We are pretty lucky that he wasn't deployed for as long as he has been back. Granted, we spent a good portion of his dwell time apart, BUT he wasn't in a combat zone so that's good. He'll be leaving at the end of February (so soon, you ask?... yes). It's only for 6 months and he'll be going to Afghanistan this time, to a pretty safe area. He is assigned to do a specific task so he'll not be on convoys and all that nonsense... it's not an Army assignment, technically. Good news: money, good for his career, awards, coins, reset the dwell time, won't have to go again for at least another year (can attend Logan & Torey's wedding for sure!), Kevin will be there too. Bad news: missing stuff... our 7th anniversary, Brennan's 1st birthday, my birthday, his birthday, Noah's birthday. Birthdays and anniversaries come every year.

We had the option to not go this time. We talked about it at great length last night and decided it would be better to go now on a safe and short tour to get it out of the way, than to be surprised with God-only-knows-what in June/July. We have things we are planning for August and he'll be back by then. So... it's crappy, but it could be much much worse. I will have Adriana here to help! Crazy how God looks out for us before we know we need it. Adriana and I are going to travel and have a good time while Josh is gone. It'll give him something fun to read while he's away. I will finish Tristan's scrapbook and hopefully Brennan's too. I'll work out and lose weight. I'll get depressed and cry in my cheerios about being lonely... same drill ;) haha. Last night we hugged and I said "I wish you didn't love this job so much"... but he does and I love him. I fully support him. This time will come to an end eventually. With this lifestyle the good far outweighs the bad for us. Neither one of us is ready to plant roots yet. Still... separation stinks :P

When I would drop Josh off at the airport in the states I always felt like somewhat of a hero myself. I knew the people around understood what was happening... or at least could assume as much. They sympathized and felt heartsick for me, watching him leave us behind. It felt good to feel that sense of empathy from the American people. Here it won't be like that. This is Spain. I doubt they'll even notice me. Though, I probably won't be dropping him off at the airport anyway. Just a thought I had. I know I will get tons of support from the unit here. Everyone is amazing. I couldn't ask for better people by our sides.

Am I sad? Always a little sad. Am I angry? Always a little angry. Am I fine? I'm always fine. This is what we do.

Comments

Britni said…
Well I think you guys made the best decision that you could for your family and I am sure you are right that it was better for him to go now then wait. You are very brave and I feel for you. I know it must be so hard!!! but you have a great outlook on life and I too think you will be fine. That is wonderful that you will have Adriana there to help you and keep you company!!! I hope you guys are able to get in a ton of family time in February before Josh is deployed.
heatherwallis said…
I love the way you write on you blog.. that almost made me cry reading it!! But things will work out I know you can do it!! And if you need to talk or whatever you have my number and if not you got my facebook. You can call anytime it doesn't matter!!
You are such a strong woman and always look on the up side of this. I give you so much credit. I'm sure its difficult to make these decisions.

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