Last Night

I usually don't go to sleep until after 1am because one or both of the boys will inevitably get up around that time and need something. 11 o'clock rolls around and I hear Noah start to wail. He has to go potty. That's always the case when he wakes up in the middle of the night. Sometimes it's accompanied by leg cramps... like this time. Poor Noah has leg cramps quite often. I know exactly how he feels because I get them all the time. Motrin always works. So, I gave him some Motrin and asked him if he could fall back asleep. He squeaked out a yes and I left his room and listened in the hallway (I know better). He started wimpering again, not for me, just in general because he was in pain. I went right back in and started rubbing his poor little toothpick legs. I remember my mom doing the same for me when I was little and it was the greatest feeling ever.

He was starting to fall back asleep, but it was obvious the Motrin hadn't kicked in yet because every once in awhile he would twitch and roll, scrunch his legs up or straighten them out. I asked him if he wanted me to lay down for a little bit. "Yes"... so there we were, laying in his little bed cuddling and I just felt this overwhelming love. I was looking at his chubby cheeks and his long eyelashes, opening and closing more slowly as he was drifting off. I realized that this was one of those moments I would always remember and treasure, and one that he would probably forget. I got a little choked up, gave him a hug and kiss and told him I was going to go back to my bed. He said "OK" and went right back to sleep.

About an hour later Tristan woke up to eat and I fell asleep in my nursing chair with him. When I woke up he was passed out with a nice milk drool stream running down his cheek. My neck was aching from falling asleep with my head cocked to the side, watching him. I enjoyed holding my little sleeping baby for awhile and then placed him in the crib and went back to my room. Josh was turned facing the door, fast asleep with his hand under my pillow. I smiled and climbed into bed, gave him a kiss and went to sleep with my man.

I have not felt this much love in a long time and I can't express how thankful I am to have these 3 in my life. No matter how hard things may be, how tired I am, how boring life can get... I really love my life. I was trying to tell Josh about it, but I am so bad with words (when I talk). So, I wrote about it instead. I am not usually sappy and emotional, but kids will do that to you ;) That one night has recharged my batteries and had me feeling great. I haven't been annoyed with Noah since! hahaha... and that's an accomplishment :)

Comments

Jen said…
I hear you girl! Although i have these moments a lot during the day. Just looking at my babies and thanking God so much for blessing me with them. Then I start to think deeper on how God looks at me this same way, I'm his little girl! Crazy!
Does Noah eat bananas? My dad always gets leg cramps and he went to the dr and they told him that it was because he was low in potassium. So he started eating bananas and it went away.
Hope it helps and I hope he feels better!
Britni said…
I know exactly how you feel. I check on Ava every night around midnight. I always stand there looking at her and admire how sweet & perfect she looks while she is dreaming happily. When Ava woke up from her nap this afternoon she had a night mare & wanted to sit in my lap until she felt better. She ended up hugging me while I watched tv for a whole hour. It was so nice snuggling with her while she laid her head on my shoulder. She wasn't sleeping & she wasn't watching tv...I wonder what she was thinking :) I was thinking I could hold her forever. I never get tired of holding my babies.
Ever time I nurse Ember I think the same things. I am like you & I feel so lucky everyday.

I liked hearing about your evening. It just all seemed so familiar to me. I feel the same things that you do :)
Anonymous said…
I know what you mean about your boys. I love both my kids, but something about Eric is special. I was having a really bad day last week. It was about 8:30pm and Eric was already in bed watching TV. So I crawled in bed with him. Most 11 year olds would probably freak out, but not my Eric. He just looked at me and smiled. We talked briefly, but we just laid there watching MythBusters! I just needed a reminder of why I'm on this earth. To love my children and raise them the best I can. I felt so much better!

Like Noah, Haleigh has those leg cramps quite often. Most nights I am also laying in bed with her rubbing her shins. I feel so bad for her. But again I love laying there with her, stroking her hair. A nice reminder of what having kids is all about.

Love
Pam
Amalia said…
I am happy for you Allie. I have those moments, but I am sure with all of your guys there you had a very complete feeling. You have been waiting along time for that. And you deserve it.
Anonymous said…
I am so old and I often wondered when those all encompassing moments hit when you are just so "in love" with your child and admiring their sweet little faces...."Did my mom feel this way about me?" And I know she did, we must all get that "gift". Isn't it nice to know your mom loved you as much as you love your own little ones? Hmmmm.....maybe we do need a woman president. LOL

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